And I'm Back
After 28 days spent abroad, I finally returned to Singapore soil last night. And what a fucking welcome, akin to a slap in the face, reminding me immediately of everything I loathe about this country.
Of course I looked suspicious, a lone traveller returning with four pieces of luggage and a huge H&M plastic bag, all stuffed full of shopping. Again I was picked out and asked to pass my bags through the X-ray.
This time I quickly declared my remaining two packs of duty-free cigarettes, which probably saved me from a fine. However, they were far more interested in my DVDs, which took up three huge plastic bags inside my gigantic duffel bag, as well as the antique opium pipe I bought in 上環 (Sheung Wan).
The customs people told me as long as I had over 5 titles, I needed a permit to bring them in. Otherwise, they had to retain them and send the DVDs to the Media Development (ha!) Authority (MDA), who would graciously decide on my behalf whether the discs were fit for my viewing. They would then, of course, send me a grossly inflated bill for all the hard "work" they did. Total count - 57 titles, with probably close to 100 discs, due to multi-disc sets.
I shan't even bother to rant about this ridiculous dictatorial practice, because we are a democratic country, and certainly not a dictatorship or a communist state, even though it might feel that way at times. I won't even talk about the pathetic stores in Singapore that only carry the latest blockbuster hits, or shitty local versions or China parallel imports without any decent features, or insist on selling DVDs at an inflated price.
Hell, I won't even complain about the two hours I waited for the officer from the Central Narcotics Bureau who had to travel to the airport to confirm that the pipe did not, in fact, hold any opium, and that I could have it, with a stern warning never to bring such drug paraphernalia into the country again. Of course it didn't matter that I intended only to use it as a display piece on my shelf.
What I will talk about is how I will never take the dreaded UA 895 flight from Hong Kong to Singapore ever again in my life. I've taken it exactly twice, and both times I got into trouble with customs. If that's not a huge fucking sign to avoid the cursed flight like the plague, I don't know what is. I think perhaps our 八字不合 (eight characters clash) or something.
Anyway it's of small consolation that the same thing happened to my ex-boss, even though he had far fewer DVDs with him, and mostly Kurosawa. As if the customs idiots would know anything about Kurosawa. At least I'm not the only film-lover that gets fucked over by customs and the MDA. Another small consolation - they completely missed my porn. Whee. But I'd really rather have my DVDs than any amount of porn.
It's really things like these that make me hate my country. They may all seem small and trivial, but it all adds up to a pretty damn good reason for migration. I really like the vibe in Hong Kong; perhaps one day I just might decide to move there for good.
Going back to work today felt weird. But at least I was all togged out in H&M, causing my boss to comment that I looked like I just stepped off a plane from the Bahamas. New look, and hopefully some new direction.
Of course I looked suspicious, a lone traveller returning with four pieces of luggage and a huge H&M plastic bag, all stuffed full of shopping. Again I was picked out and asked to pass my bags through the X-ray.
This time I quickly declared my remaining two packs of duty-free cigarettes, which probably saved me from a fine. However, they were far more interested in my DVDs, which took up three huge plastic bags inside my gigantic duffel bag, as well as the antique opium pipe I bought in 上環 (Sheung Wan).
The customs people told me as long as I had over 5 titles, I needed a permit to bring them in. Otherwise, they had to retain them and send the DVDs to the Media Development (ha!) Authority (MDA), who would graciously decide on my behalf whether the discs were fit for my viewing. They would then, of course, send me a grossly inflated bill for all the hard "work" they did. Total count - 57 titles, with probably close to 100 discs, due to multi-disc sets.
I shan't even bother to rant about this ridiculous dictatorial practice, because we are a democratic country, and certainly not a dictatorship or a communist state, even though it might feel that way at times. I won't even talk about the pathetic stores in Singapore that only carry the latest blockbuster hits, or shitty local versions or China parallel imports without any decent features, or insist on selling DVDs at an inflated price.
Hell, I won't even complain about the two hours I waited for the officer from the Central Narcotics Bureau who had to travel to the airport to confirm that the pipe did not, in fact, hold any opium, and that I could have it, with a stern warning never to bring such drug paraphernalia into the country again. Of course it didn't matter that I intended only to use it as a display piece on my shelf.
What I will talk about is how I will never take the dreaded UA 895 flight from Hong Kong to Singapore ever again in my life. I've taken it exactly twice, and both times I got into trouble with customs. If that's not a huge fucking sign to avoid the cursed flight like the plague, I don't know what is. I think perhaps our 八字不合 (eight characters clash) or something.
Anyway it's of small consolation that the same thing happened to my ex-boss, even though he had far fewer DVDs with him, and mostly Kurosawa. As if the customs idiots would know anything about Kurosawa. At least I'm not the only film-lover that gets fucked over by customs and the MDA. Another small consolation - they completely missed my porn. Whee. But I'd really rather have my DVDs than any amount of porn.
It's really things like these that make me hate my country. They may all seem small and trivial, but it all adds up to a pretty damn good reason for migration. I really like the vibe in Hong Kong; perhaps one day I just might decide to move there for good.
Going back to work today felt weird. But at least I was all togged out in H&M, causing my boss to comment that I looked like I just stepped off a plane from the Bahamas. New look, and hopefully some new direction.
posted by cinewhore @ 11:55 PM
0 mindfucks
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gimme some mindfuckery
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