Number 1000

I keep a record of what movies I've seen projected in theatres. In fact, it doesn't even have to be in a theatre, it can be anywhere. However, there are certain criteria.

1. It must be in a formal setting. By that I mean that there is conscious programming, eg. in a film festival, or a screening organized by some student group, etc.

2. It has to be projected.

3. I must sit through the entire movie. Walkouts are not counted. I'm usually pretty generous, so this is usually not a problem.

4. But I can fall asleep during the screening. I can't help it sometimes. Other times, I actually force myself to sleep.

5. Short films are only counted as part of a program, eg. at the Chicago International Film Festival. But usually I don't count them. It depends on my mood.

6. Films screened during classes are not eligible, unless I see them again elsewhere.

Now, I didn't consciously come up with these rules. I pretty much made them up as I went along. I've been doing it since 1992, thirteen years ago.

It's very much an indication of how ridiculous I can be, even as a kid.

I also realize I've kinda written about this before, but this is an expanded edition.

The numbers aren't entirely accurate, because of some China kids' movies that I cannot for the life of me recall, but they're pretty alright as a ballpark figure.

Why do I mention this?

Because recently I realized I was going to hit the big 1000. Getting all excited, I went about organizing an Event this coming Sunday (i.e., tomorrow). I was going to see Millions, which was appropriate because, as Jingcai helpfully pointed out, a million is 1000 thousands. Response wasn't exactly overwhelming, because somehow when you say a movie stars two kids, and no celebrities, people can lose interest rather quickly.

But I have to announce that the Event has officially become a Non-Event.

See, when I made my new entries in my handy black notebook a few days ago, I'd neglected to put that piece of crap that was The Ring Two in it. In fact, I only noticed it when I scrolled down to my One-Word Movie Review post just minutes ago. As such, I realized with a sinking feeling that I'd already hit 1000 without even realizing it.

My 1000th movie in theatres was The Hidden Blade. I saw it in a rush, sandwiched in-between two social engagements. Alone. It was decidedly a Non-Event.

At least it was a good movie, and not something like Sahara.

And while I'm consoling myself, I might as well remember the fact that I probably hit the magic number quite some time ago, because of the few China kids' movies I saw as a little kid that I couldn't remember.

I'm still going ahead with the movie. Hell, 1001 is a nice number too. Even if it's not entirely accurate. Ever heard of The 1001 Nights?

I just realized that this post reflects how sad my life is. Please excuse me while I go slit my wrists.